Share the Worst to Get the Best

By Steven Schneider

"Vulnerable" is one of those words that can make you cringe a little. It sounds like you're about to get ambushed by a bear. Sure, it technically means being at risk or susceptible to attack, but in business relationships, it’s about opening up.

Being vulnerable isn’t about slapping a fake "I'm-the-perfect-leader" sticker on your forehead. Instead, it’s about embracing the mess we all try to hide—the quirks, the flaws, and the past failings. It’s showing the full range of your personality, from "confident entrepreneur" to "I-have-no-idea-what-I’m-doing" human.

Sure, you’re taking a risk when you decide to become vulnerable with your business partner, but it’s the kind that builds stronger, more genuine connections.

Time to Stop Hiding Feelings

When Todd and I decided to become business partners, we agreed upfront that there was no room for pretending. We’d spent enough years putting on a front with former colleagues and partners, and honestly, we were over it. Trying to look like we had everything together when we didn’t was exhausting.

Our early partnership talks? Let’s just say they were brutally honest. We laid out everything—our professional mess-ups, the things that made us mad, and every single mistake we’d ever made. It wasn’t exactly fun, but it did feel like a much-needed cleanup.

Once we got through all the awkwardness, we realized something: being upfront made us trust each other more. We knew exactly who we were dealing with, flaws and all, and it actually made us more confident in our partnership. No secrets, no pretending—just two people being real.

In the Right Situations, Vulnerability is a Strength

Until recently, showing any kind of vulnerability at work was treated like a career-ending mistake. Expressing emotions or admitting to personal challenges was about as welcome as showing up in pajamas. As two guys who lived through those times, trust us—it was not fun. If you were struggling with a task, you kept it quiet and hoped no one noticed. If you had a death in the family, you took a personal day, stayed silent, and got back to work like nothing happened.

Men who took paternity leave were seen as slackers. Women? They were automatically labeled as too emotional for the job. If you needed to see a doctor or take medication, you made sure no one found out. Even if everything in your life was falling apart, you’d still walk into the office with a smile and act like you had it all together. Mental health day? What’s that?

We worked very hard to look like flawless professionals—strong, competent, and unshakable. It wore us down, and looking back, we’re not sure why we thought pretending everything was fine was a good idea.

Over time, the norms began to evolve. Leaders and experts recognized the power of authenticity, and the idea of bringing your whole self to work gained momentum. Embracing vulnerability is now seen as a strength—a way to build balance, increase workplace satisfaction, and unlock greater productivity. Today, vulnerability isn’t just accepted in corporate America—it’s celebrated as a key to healthier, more connected teams.

Our Superpower

Being vulnerable is about showing up, being real, and earning respect. When I’m open and honest about what’s going on in my life—my concerns, my challenges, and my fears—it creates space for the other person to do the same. It’s not just about sharing; it’s about building trust and mutual respect. In our partnership, this level of honesty means we’re always on the same page. When we both understand what’s happening, why it’s happening, and how it’s impacting us, we can tackle challenges head-on, respond with compassion, and make smarter, more effective decisions together. Vulnerability isn’t a weakness—it’s our superpower.

When my kids were young, I opened up to Todd about my fears of missing out on family time. My kids were everything to me, and the thought of them growing up feeling like their dad valued work over them was something I couldn’t bear. When I shared this with Todd, he didn’t brush it off or offer platitudes like “everyone feels that way” or “that’s just part of the job.” Instead, he listened—really listened—and stepped up in ways that allowed me to create a much deeper, more meaningful connection with my family.

Over the years, Todd has faced his own challenges and concerns, and I’ve been more than happy to adjust things to help him prioritize what matters most to him. That’s what true partnership is about—having each other’s backs and making space for life’s most important priorities.

In the end, being open and honest—sharing our fears, our challenges, and our realities—has allowed us to truly see each other for who we are. This openness has created a cycle of mutual respect, where the more I share with Todd, the more he shares with me, and the easier it becomes to keep that connection strong. It’s a simple pattern, but one with profound results. Not only has it strengthened our business, but it’s also brought more clarity and balance to our lives. Vulnerability isn’t just good for partnerships—it’s essential.